Blaire is picking out clothes for…her date. Blaire’s never been on a date! A real date with someone she didn’t know. Serena advises her that she behave. Serena reveals that she thinks Rufus cheated. Lily doesn’t know yet. Will thinks they should wait to tell her. Blaire offers mob connections. She also recommends no handcuffs for a first date.
Chuck is looking into Lily’s medicine. Jenny is grounded so she whispers about it. Her dad catches her anyway. Nate wants to go see Serena. He says she’s in a good place. She’s not keeping secrets any more. Chuck sends his regards to Blaire…The pill results are in.
Jenny says she didn’t do anything wrong. V has left! Good news! Rufus heads to Lily’s for Jenny’s books.
Will gives Lily her pills. They discuss the things she had when pregnant with Serena. She brings up his speech…he says he got caught up in the moment, it came out wrong. She was hoping that happened. He’s just thrilled to get to know the kids. How could they get through “this” without him. Call to Jenny, the pill results are in. Not relevant to lymphoma. Found! He intends to use this to get back with Blaire. Only an expert can get this information. Blaire tells her to meet him at the Waldorf’s for despite her grounding she goes.
Serena tells Rufus basically says get lost. He asks if it is Lily or Serena? So they call Holland up, she acts all uncomfortable, and she says they slept together. He’s surprised by this news. (Clearly bribed! Well played Will, he pretends to play dumb though.) Will kicks him out. Rufus refuses. Nate arrives wondering what he missed. Rufus apologizes that she’s insane. Lily doesn’t see what she had left to prove. She doubts him. He says he wouldn’t do that.
Nate doesn’t think Rufus did it. He knows Rufus better than that. All guys are good until they aren’t anymore. He wants her to give him a chance. She’d rather not talk about it. She should go be with her family.
Jenny doesn’t understand why they need Blaire. Blaire says no. He needs to find out why someone doesn’t want Lily getting better. She won’t miss her date and next time don’t bring Jenny.
Lily and Eric walk around. Lily says she’s not sure how she’s doing. She doesn’t want to get yet another divorce. All he cares about is that she’s still “here.”
Nate meets up with Dan. He wants to see what he finds out before talking to Serena. They interrupt Blaire’s date for help. Her dates seems into it so she agrees.
Jenny says she’s learned how to lie. She manages a lie. It turns out, Holland is the psychiatrist prescribing Lily’s drugs. Jenny looks for more pills of Lily’s to link the pills to Holland. Blaire thinks Holland wants Rufus to herself. (Nope, but close!) They need to get to Holland first. They know where she is. Chuck is rude to her date. So they do this a lot? Yeah, a lot more than you’d think. Dan doesn’t normally participate.
Will and Serena come in with a gift for Lily. Serena wishes they’d stayed with Will. Maybe Lily wasn’t with the right man. Will says he won’t take advantage of the situation to get closer to her. She pushes, as always the clueless one. He invites them to the Library benefit. Jenny is searching for pills, finds the pulls she’s looking for when Serena walks in. She fails to hide it but she says she’s trying to help. Until Serena is rude enough to make her say she’d rather go back to Brooklyn forever. Lily sees her leaving and says she doesn’t want them fighting because of Rufus. She says she’s fine. Serena suggests the benefit. Lily agrees, loving Will’s gift.
Blaire is dressed. Her date has other plans so he isn’t around. Jenny arrives and pretends she found nothing. Blaire has a contingency plan. (Really, you’d rather destroy your dad just to get away from Serena?)
The benefit has begun. Blaire worries about Serena being there and ruining the plan. Jenny is supposed to wait for the guy they are bringing in. Chuck tries to play the part but she pulls away. Jenny calls to tell the doctor to forget waiting for Nate who was getting him. Serena sees her and picks up her own phone. She sees her parents dancing and is thrilled. Lily likes being there with someone who doesn’t hate these events.
Blaire and Chuck spot Holland. Rufus spots Jenny–he came when Serena called. She claims to be trying to help him. Serena sees that everyone is there and stalks away. Nate chases after her. “Anyone who doesn’t support your dad has to go?” She thinks he should have trusted him. They distract her and then threaten to out her. She owed a favor to Will. She wrote the prescriptions for him. Jenny tells Will what happened. Will plays surprised. She tells him to leave asap. Why? She wants him to get his family back so she can get hers back. (Once a spoiled brat…)
The Van Der Woodsens are about to leave and Dan sees them.
Will claims he has to go to Palm Beach and the family plans to come. Eric looks shocked but he agrees. Nate calls but she ignores it. As she packs she gets a call from Dan who tells him the truth. Shockingly she doesn’t listen. Serena suggests waiting a day but he says he can’t. In comes Rufus.
The crew brainstorms about what happened. Will Lily believe them?
Will and Rufus fight. Eric interrupts to ask if she was even sick and he says “of course she was sick.” (Was, meaning not anymore, meaning he screwed up.) Serena says he doesn’t have to prove himself but he feels he does. He leaves to prove himself. But he’s gone. Serena can’t believe it. She doesn’t think he would leave her. They should call the police. If they wait he’ll be gone for good. Blaire realizes the big question: who tipped William off about leaving? Jenny admits that it was her.
Dan finds Serena alone downstairs, back in her “daddy abandoned me” sadness.
William is getting ready to board when Serena arrives. She wants the truth! (Isn’t it obvious?!?) He says Lily was sick originally but he cured her and fell in love again. And he realized he’d messed up with Serena and Eric and he wanted his family back. She says all he needed was “to be here.” But he didn’t think she’d give him a chance. She tells him to leave because the police are coming. He asks her to come with him but she doesn’t forgive. Final I love you hug and she sends him off so that he won’t get caught. He gets in a cab and drives away. The police pass by.
Lily is sorry she didn’t believe him. They’re happy again. But Jenny…time to deal with her. She points out that William wasn’t the only problem. They always fight and they keep secrets. They all get dragged into their issues. Jenny pretends that Brooklyn was better. He says what needs to get back to normal is her. Eric tells her no one is forcing her to stay. (So she runs away again? Cause as I said, I wouldn’t be disappointed.)
Blaire is waiting for part two of her date. Chuck waits with her and says she felt “it.” She says it was a role play scheme. She says they aren’t safe no matter what they feel. He gives her a deadline of tomorrow. He gives her until 7:01 the next day or he’s closing his heart to her. She says she doesn’t care, but clearly…she’s still thinking about it.
Serena gets a call from Nate. She says she got to him before her dad did and this is why she doesn’t talk to him about things. Right, because that’s the issue. And Dan is the one who was with her. (Does this mean they’re getting back together?)
Nate starts drinking when in comes Jenny to live. She thought he’d be with Serena. So…they kiss now? Well, he takes her bags at least.
Parts of this were excellent. All that scheming! But the end was a little blase.