Ruby and the Rockits We Are Family?

Patrick wants to go on a family road trip but no one else is interested.

Jordan is playing guitar and wants her to sing the girls’ part in his duet. She warns him that she might have to leave in the middle because she’s going somewhere with her dad. The song is about him liking her but she is totally dense. Ben suggests that maybe Ruby isn’t really their cousin, maybe they were lied to. He can take a paternity test to find out. David shows up with someone named Martin (an ex-Rolling Stones employee) who will be tagging along on their time in order to write about them. Ruby is upset but David doesn’t get it. But he needs it to reach his demographic.

Patrick says he doesn’t like interviews but he likes it anyway. She vents to Jordan who offers a hug and won’t take no for an answer. He uses it as an opportunity to pull a hair out of her head. Rather than, as Ben suggests, take a hair from her brush.

Martin finally leaves and will be back with a photographer. Nothing else. Ruby is upset.  Martin has one last question, what does he remember about her mother? He says he doesn’t remember her. But he does remember a bit–“white curtain, red flowers, new orleans, barefoot in the kitchen…”

Cue Ruby writing a song blatantly about him remembering his night with her mom. Jordan comes in asking where her dad is, he needs to get a sample from David too. The description that her dad gave seems to match the description of her house. She realizes he made it all up. She talks to Auddie that night, though Auddie can’t really comfort her. It isn’t on purpose. Patrick tells her words have no effect on him. David responds to actions. (As per an old video of them performing.) Ruby comes up with an evil little plan.

No photographer arrives with Martin the next day. He just has a camera with him. Jordan attempts to get a hair sample but David doesn’t let anyone touch his hair. Ruby comes in with a black kid named Thomas who Ruby says is his son. In comes an Asian girl who is “also his daughter.” The kids and Patrick and Auddie are all in on the joke. David wants to talk to Ruby privately. She says she’s upset about him lying. He does remember the day he met her and what she was wearing. He’s sorry. They hug.

Jordan has the samples. They realize that if they’re related he can’t like her but if not she wouldn’t keep living with them. So he throws out the samples instead.

Auddie drops off the magazine. They made it on page 94. Just a photo and a caption. She wonders what it had been like when her mom met her dad. She misses her mom and she thinks of Auddie as her mom now.

Jordan plays his song for Martin who loves it.


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